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I walked into the room where my 4 year old was sitting on the couch. She looks at me with her index finger pointed and says “mommy, I have poop on my finger”. You would think this would be the point where I would gag or perhaps start some sort of interrogation on how fecal material ended up on her finger but no. I simply ask her to go wash her hands with soap and water.
That was my Monday. How was yours?

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Yes, I Admit I have a Pooping Problem

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Skid Marks and the Advanced Skill of Wiping

Skid marks, racing stripes, whatever you choose to call them they are nasty. My daughter has been completely potty trained for 2 years now but she has yet to master the skill of wiping. Because she doesn’t wipe very well she ends up with horrendous skid marks on her panties and usually a rash on her bottom. It has gotten to the point that we have to send her to school with an extra pair of panties just to mitigate the problem and when I put her into the bath at night there will be shit-chips floating in the tub. Yuck!

I thought I might be the only parent plagued with this problem but after talking with my girlfriend and her husband this weekend I was relieved to find out that their 4 year old son has the same problem. Of course, these skids aren’t only found in our children’s underwear. Sometime when they are putting their underwear they choose to sit on the floor or bed and that is also where you can find the unmistakable brown streak. As a parent I think I find my daughters skids more embarrassing than she does.

I admit that wiping with toilet paper does come with a higher degree of difficultly. I even know adults that have trouble with toilet paper (you know who you are). Maybe the Europeans have it right with the bidet. I’m sure a quick shower of the crack would do the trick but I’m sure that comes with other obstacles. So, the question is what can you do? Well, I’ve asked around and have done a little research and here are a few things to try if your child is wiping handicap.

1. Flushable baby wipes – These seem to be a little easier for kids to manipulate and gets the area clean with less effort.

2. Adult inspection – Have mom, dad, or the adult on duty inspect for a clean crack. If it’s not clean, give a lesson on how you should wipe until the toilet paper is clean.

3. Mirror – keep a mirror in the bathroom so your child can check to see if they did a good job.

4. Positive reinforcement - Reward your child every day they have clean undies.

For more articles on my trials and tribulations with poop:

Poop! Its just recycled food

5 Tips to Relieve Baby’s Gas

My Son Found His Wiener

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My Son Found His Wiener

Why is it that men feel so comfortable touching themselves regardless of the audience or situation? I used to think it was because they felt more comfortable with themselves than women do but now I believe it is something more primitive. I believe men are born with a reflex that compels them to automatically check their junk without even thinking about it. Growing up with brothers I have always been aware of boy’s fascinations with their body parts but it wasn’t until I watched my son discover his wiener that I truly understood that this is all apart of the development process.

It was like any other diaper changing event. I was quickly wiping off the poop that had lodged itself in every crack and cranny. During this procedure is when this primitive reflex started. My son very cautiously reached down and gave himself a tug. It was as if he found a new toy and from that diaper change on it has been the same discovery over and over.

I think the most interesting part of this event was my husband’s reaction. His reaction was not of disgust or embarrassment, which, is what he does when our daughter does something similar. He was actually proud, like this was a “that’s my boy” moment. Maybe this is a right of passage that every male makes but for me as a mom, my epiphany was that I am actually raising a man and this is just one of many discoveries he will make during his life. I just wish he would stop “discovering” while I’m wiping poop off of him.

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Poop! Its just recycled food

As a parent I’m sure you don’t think much of it at the time but for an outsider listening in I’m sure it sounds like poop is a major daily conversation. Poop is what makes the world go round during those first few years of your kid’s life. The conversation starts out like: “did the baby poop?” “How many times?”, “Color?”, “Consistency?”, “When was the last time the baby pooped?”, “It is your turn to change the poopy” , and my favorite “Yah, you went poopy on the potty!”. Part of the necessity to talk about the poop is because you can really learn a lot about the health of your child based on details of the poo. Still, when you think about the evolution of your relationship with your spouse did you ever think when you were dating that you would be having daily conversations about bowel movements?

I realize that this poop topic is primarily a phenomenon primarily experienced by parents which is why I understand why my girlfriend Brooke used to call me periodically to hear about the latest poop story. She found my day to day life as a mom rather entertaining and especially the poo stories. (I doubt she finds poop nearly as funny now that she has a 5 month old.) I remember telling her once about my daughter and how every time I would lay her in a nice warm bath suddenly she would be surrounded by several little poop land mines. Brooke would laugh hysterically at this and proceed to tell her husband. I could hear her husband gagging and dry heaving in the background, apparently just the thought of this was enough to gross him out. Brooke then asked me “how does this not gross you out?” I told her “I don’t really think about it. I get in there, clean it up and everyone is happier for it. Poop is just recycled food.”

It’s a privilege to join the ranks of mom and dad and maybe one of those perks is the ability to talk about poop without snickers and judgment. I only wish that as part of the enlistment process someone would hand out our poop protection shields and the all important poop decoder ring.

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5 Tips to Relieve Baby’s Gas

Gas

Baby will initially have some gas. It will take some time for baby to get used to eating breast milk or formula. You may want to consider laying off spicy food and excessive amounts of chocolate/coffee (anything with caffeine) until baby’s digestive system acclimates.

Here are a few suggestions that may help relieve gas pain for your baby.

• Simethicone – active ingredient like the name brand “mylicon ”. This is almost the miracle cure.
• Lay baby on tummy. Pressure on the tummy helps relieves gas pressure.
• Tummy massage. Massage tummy using lotion in a circle “C” motion. Create the “c” shape around the belly button. This follows the digestive track and helps push the gas and poopy out.
• Patting the bottom. Put baby over your shoulder and pat baby on the bottom in rhythmic time.
• Food culprits. If baby is having a lot of gas you may want to investigate any new food they are eating or if you are breast feeding you may want to cut back on any food that could be causing excess gas. Occasionally diary products can cause gas discomfort so you may need to cut down on eating diary if you are breast feeding

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